What In The World Does One Say?

I went to brunch this afternoon at the home of my two friends Vic and Lou (I know, how queer, Sunday brunch). They had put out a fantastic spread as usual. There was enough food there to feed five times the seven people who were there. After a leisurely meal Lou remembered that they hadn't given me my Christmas present yet.

Out comes a meticulously wrapped gift box with a good bit of heft to it. Trying to not look like an over eager five year old I carefully unwrapped the box and gently eased the top off of the box to find. . .

Yup, you guessed it. A giant blue dildo!

What ever does one say in a situation like that. After feeling my face flush crimson I think I managed to stammer out a quick "Uh, thanks guys" or something to that effect, but I really wasn't sure what the proper sex toy giving etiquette was. Is it okay for casual friends to make a gift of dildos to one another (and is there an e on the plural version of dildo?), and if so should the gift be given in private because nobody else got a toy to play with? Do I need to send a thank you note for this? If so is it okay to scribble one on a copy of Torso or Advocate Men?

Oh, if only Emily Post or Miss Manners could help me with this one, unfortunately I think the only who may have the answer would be Dan Savage.

p.s.
Did you know that when you google the term "blue dildo" google returns 4,250 hits for that? Well, you know it now.