Am I Speaking Ingles?

Have you ever had one of those days where you are fairly certain that you are speaking English but maybe you have reverse sort of Star Trek tricorder thing going on that instead of translating it garbles things up to make you unintelligible to the rest of the world? That is the sort of day I am having today. I don't think I have been saying anything at all complicated. It started when I stopped by work to pick up some papers and I said hello to a coworker who then proceeded to stare blankly at me. I repeated and got another blank stare. I can understand that. . .shellshock happens often at my job.
Next I tried to use the restroom and of course people were standing all around the entrance talking (because who doesn't love the ambiance surrounding a restroom entrance?). A couple of polite excuse me got hostile stares and no movement. I began thinking maybe instead of excuse me I had said "Move of the large buttocks out of my way promptly or pay the price in blood," but no, I had actually said plain old excuse me.
After finally being able to relieve myself I stopped on my way back home to get something quick to eat. Again I am positive that I ordered my food to go and yet there it was on a tray. After asking if I could get my food in a bag to go the young lady (and I use that term oh so loosely) asked why didn't I order it to go if I wanted it to go and then walked away (What? Are you kidding me? No I'm not). Finally I got the attention of somebody else to ask them to put my food in a bag and got another blank stare.
Sometimes I wonder why I bother so I just took the whole tray and left.
I think I'll just take a nap now and start all over in an hour or so. . .maybe by then I'll make some sense to somebody.