DateLine
Gumby, from You Can't Handle the Truthiness, and I have been threatening to share with each other horror stories of our dating lives and exboyfriends. I would just like to get that little ball rolling by sharing a little list of dating faux pas, all of which occured on my date last night.
- Do not spend fifteen minutes on your cell phone talking to another man while at the restaurant.
- Do not be rude to the waitress and say things rather loudly like "Where the fuck is that waitress".
- Do not repeatedly check out the ass (no matter how hot it is) of the 18 year old busboy and then loudly proclaim just how hot said ass is to the person you are dining with.
- Do not enquire of the person you are dining with if he thinks every random hot guy in the restaurant is gay or not. Newsflash: There are hot straight guys.
- Do not grab your dates crotch and say "I can't wait to get a look at your wiener". At least that happened in the car and not in the restaurant.
- Do not refer to penises (what is the plural of penis anyway?) as wieners (unless you are actually fourteen years old)
- Don't stick your tongue all the way down the other persons throat during a polite kiss goodnight.
- Don't brag about how everywhere you go guys always flirt with you.
On the upside he did pay for dinner.
posted by Vinnie G. @ 12:09 PM
13 Comments:
Wow, I'm not gay and even I know that's shit you don't do on a date. Wow, Will and Grace did teach me something.
This reminds me of my Less Than One Hour Date From Hell.
The guy actually ordered a small side salad for himself, after I ordered a fried fish dinner -- then proceeded to eat half my meal telling me how "I'd be cute if I lost some weight".
I basically said, "Drive me home NOW." If I had had the $, I would have taken a taxi.
He made me pay for my own meal.
And no, he did not get to play tonsil-hockey.
...he actually said "weiner"....
???
eewww
Ugh. How wretched.
Good advice lol
-Julia
My Blog: Aesthetic Vibrations
He should have paid for a lot more than dinner.
Please tell me he did NOT do all of that! What a loser!
So, when's your next date with him?
BTW... I hate to be picky... but you misstated my blog name...
I think that deserves a big old "WTF, mate?"
Who DOES that sort of stuff in public, let alone on a date? It almost seems as if he is still attempting to come to terms with appropriate comportment with respect to public decency.
I think that deserves a big old "WTF, mate?"
Who DOES that sort of stuff in public, let alone on a date? It almost seems as if he is still attempting to come to terms with appropriate comportment with respect to public decency.
Vinny -- Jesus Christ, how typical -- I just *knew* you couldn't behave yourself on a date.
...Oh, wait...You were describing what the *other* guy did...
I'm sure *your* behavior was exemplary! Yes?
Wait a minute - there are hot straight me? And they are single? Fallacy I tell you! And also blasphemy!
Well D. that is the rumor.
Please tell me he didn't take you to a FRANCHISE restaurant as well.
Darling, next time - take your own money, and leave this type of a-hole sitting alone while you excuse yourself, go to the bathroom and leave out the back entrance. NOBODY, should put up with that crap. If you actually did - I have a lot less respect for you than I did a few days ago. Just because you want some (or don't) doesn't mean you have to de-mean yourself! Didn't your mother teach you better???!!!
Good GRIEF! What an *sshole Idiot. Not good enough for the Vinnie, I'm afraid! Geez...
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